I really believe that there comes a point in everyone’s life where they think ‘why am I here?’, or ‘Am I happy in my life?’. It is my belief that we all, at some point, consider what it means to be alive and how to best live our lives.
Really big questions which often require really big answers. And I genuinely believe that this is becoming more and more of a thought for many people out there. More and more of us want more time and financial freedom to spend on the things we love, and more of us are realising that the normal life, the rat-race, and the ‘work hard to retire pretty’ approach just won’t cut it. It is not just enough to have a job, go from A to B, and float through life until you retire on a buck. You want to extract the maximum possible experience from life and pursue every dream you ever had.
Having said that, you probably feel fearful and lost when it comes to understanding what you can do to make your dream life come true, or at least how to follow your passions and find your meaning. You might have the fear that you don’t know where to start or what to do to change your circumstance and pursue your dreams. In other words, you feel that you want to make big changes in your life to start finding your true passions and fulfillment (which takes you closer to your happiness) but you just don’t know how to take this feeling and turn it into action. Especially the case if you are mid 20’s to mid-’30s and all of a sudden life is flashing you by. It’s scary how quickly the years are racking up and you might be feeling more stuck as more time passes by.
I get that, and knowing that you want more or that you don’t want to live life on someone else’s terms, but not knowing how to take progressive action – this feeling can be horrible for even the most upbeat and positive person out there.
FIND A TURNING POINT AND START TO MAKE POSITIVE CHANGE
For me, turning myself to digital marketing and learning how to grow an online business seemed the best way for me to get out of the same rut I describe above. And it’s not that I dream of becoming a digital marketer, far from it. But learning skills that don’t require me to go to Uni or spend a huge sum of money – and better still learning skills from home and around my current commitments was a solution that worked for me. It almost instantly became the solution that had always been there, the bridge to take from ‘life by default’ to ‘life by design’.
I genuinely believe it will work for the majority of people out there who want to get away from the traps of the modern career mode and do it differently, and on their own terms. And even better still when you learn how to sell online, the opportunities are endless. Becoming a member of an amazing community really felt like a turning point in my journey. Finding a community and a skill I could learn and genuinely seeing how it could allow me to bridge to the life I wanted, was huge. This turning point was the thing that gave me the ultimate belief that I COULD DO IT.
WHEN IS IT TIME FOR YOU TO FIND YOUR TURNING POINT?
Here are some sure fire indicators that you are reaching your turning point and it is maybe time for you to consider if it is time for you to make a step change in your life.
- Lacking motivation on a daily basis – Perhaps you wake up feeling tired, unmotivated and just not up for the day. Getting ready and going to work is a real challenge. You’d rather sit and binge watch Netflix than go out there and win the day. Lacking in motivation can be a real buzz kill and staying in this state can take you further and further away from your goals.
- Wondering ‘what else is out there’ – You often look around you and think ‘is this it?’. Your passion has gone and there isn’t anything around you that excites you anymore. Nothing is multi-colour, more a little grey and boring to you. You have wander lust and think must be more to life than you are currently experiencing
- Feel unfulfilled in your work – Work doesn’t excite you in the slightest. If anything, you resent being at work and often find yourself clock watching and wishing for the weekend. Living for the weekend is a sin – wasting away over 90% of your life because you don’t enjoy your work. Just think about that for a second.
- You don’t feel like you are spending any time on things you love – You don’t spend any time on your hobbies, or perhaps you don’t even know what you love because you feel like you have no time to figure it out. Maybe you are so busy with current life commitments that you just don’t get any time for you. Maybe you want to travel more, read more, write more, spend more time with your family. When you feel starved of these things it can quickly leave you feeling spent and unhappy.
- You are lacking in fulfilment or purpose – This is probably one of the key pointers for you to realise you are in need of a turning point. You fear that time is just passing by and you just aren’t getting everything you want out of life. Without your purpose it can be really difficult to even enjoy the process.
- You feel like you don’t want to work for ‘the man‘ – Another really big sign that you need to find a turning point and step change in your life is when you realise you don’t want to work for the man anymore. You are tired of exhausting yourself at work for the benefit of others and just for a pay check at the end of the month. You want to be more in control if your life, your choices, your time and where you are. You feel that you want to craft your own way in life, and not just follow the whims and orders of others.
HOW TO MAKE CHANGE HAPPEN AND CREATE A TURNING POINT IN YOUR LIFE
If any of the above resonates with you, then it is time to start changing things up. You might be scared of change, or fear that you don’t have what it takes or where to turn. That’s ok, normal even. It is exactly how I felt when I first decided to make a change and do something about it. But consider the alternative – continuing to feel this way for the rest of your life, and not taking action. The risks and fears that exist from not changing surely far outweigh any fears or trepidations you might have.
Here I want to share some of my best tips for making change and creating a turning point for you, so you can really start to maneuver yourself and build your own bridge – from your current life to following your dreams.
- Take some time out to assess what you want in life – This is probably the hardest part but it is arguably the most vital and critical step in the process. DO NOT SKIP THIS PART. Without knowing what you really want in your life, how can you start to work towards change? Spend time thinking about what is really important to you, and only you. Be prepared to face yourself and ask some uncomfortable questions. But in this process you should aim to try to truly understand yourself and ultimately what a happy and fulfilled life means to you.
- Work out what you are all about – What get’s you ticking? What makes you happy? What are your values as a person? This is fluffy stuff, yes. But understanding yourself as a human and the key values and attributes which you want to stand by are very much the anchors with with all forward motion and action will stem from. You need to really hone in on yourself as an individual and tap into the inner part of what drives you, because anything short of that assessment runs the risk of missing some critical components. Only if and when you truly know yourself as a person can you really start to understand how you want to shape your life for the future.
- Invest in yourself and your skills – Now you have accomplished your inner self assessment and truly understood what you want from your life, it is time to start investing in yourself and your skills. As I said, online digital marketing for me felt like the ticket to get me to my dream life, so I invested. I invested time and I invested money. Whatever skills you want to learn you have to realise that this will come at a cost whether that be time or money, or likely both. It is time to start investing in yourself in a meaningful way and stop wasting time.
- Surround yourself with positive and like minded people – Quite often the turning point in life isn’t an aha moment but a sense that you on the right track, in your true lane and doing the things you should be doing. As the saying goes – nothing is achieved in isolation and I cannot stress enough how important it is now to start surrounding yourself with good people and people who are going to support and encourage you. It may also be time to consider negative influences on your life and to make some tough decisions in this regard, because when you start making changes there will always be some people who try to drag you back down. Don’t let them – this is your time to move forward. Finding a community you can surround yourself with will also help you in those moments of doubt, failure and set backs. And trust me, you will have them – so it is vital you have good people to help you get through and to continue on your journey of change.
- Don’t be afraid to try, and fail – The one thing most people know but it is far more easier said than done. Let’s face it: making change in life is extremely challenging, no matter who you are. If you have a life full of work, responsibility, friends, family, money, bills and all things in between then changing and transforming is really tough. So failure and set-back is inevitable and you need to start to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Things will go wrong and you will try and fail. But this is all part of the turning point and journey, so it is critical for you to become ok with trying and failing.
- Set yourself some goals, however small – Now that you have overcome the fear of failure, are willing to try things, have surrounded yourself with positive energy, and know what you want in life – it is time to set some goals. You don’t need me to tell you that setting meaningful goals, however small, is vital to start seeing the fruits of your labor. I would advise you to start small and work your way up so it may be tiny goals to get you going. What you will start to see when you set yourself goals and achieve them is the belief and confidence that you can really change your life. Achieving things feels amazing, and by setting goals you are creating opportunities to feel the rewards from your hard work and build your confidence.
- Work on new habits – Finally, we need to talk about habits. I have written a separate blog on forming new habits because I wanted to emphasize the importance of doing so. We are only as good as the sum of the decisions and actions we take, and therefore the habits you have are going to determine your long term success. Breaking bad habits is hard and this is why you need to relentlessly work on pursuing new habits and bringing them into sharp focus.
Turning points are rarely ‘aha’ moments as i have said, so read and consider the points above carefully and then start the process of implementing them. The world is out there for you, and it is yours to take. But you have to be willing to put in the work. If you do – you really can live the life of your dreams.